Forgiveness is a virtue that is practiced commonly throughout Christianity, upheld in both the Old and New Testaments. It is viewed as an essential part of Christianity and is considered a demonstration of God’s love towards us. According to Christian teachings, when a person forgives, they are not just showing mercy and empathy – they are also setting themselves free from the weight of the pain, bitterness and hatred that the wrong may have caused.
The Bible includes many Biblical figures deemed to embody forgiveness, such as Jesus. Jesus was frequently forgiving others and advocated the importance of this virtue. He said that if we can’t forgive others, then we cannot expect God to forgive us. His teachings speak to today’s world through showing that forgiveness should be given freely, regardless of any perceived wrongdoing or lack thereof.
The Bible also speaks to how one should treat others through the Golden Rule, stating a simple maxim: “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” This maxim speaks to the concept of morality, which in turn is a major theme associated with the religion itself. Forgiveness, by its basic definition, is considered a moral act of kindness, compassion, and understanding.
The Christian concept of forgiveness is an example of one of the many forms of personal responsibility being practiced by a believer. It is a way for humans to heal, restore relationships, and remain connected to each other. By showing mercy and grace to those who have wronged us, we demonstrate our faith in God and remind ourselves of the positive characteristics we can bring out in each other.
Forgiveness is not something that can be forced upon or required of the wrongdoer, or the person seeking to forgive someone. It must come from within the individual and involve some type of emotional and spiritual transformation. As well, it is important to remember that forgiveness is not necessarily the same thing as letting go. While some people may be able to forgive and forget, there may need to be consequences for the wrongs committed.
Pastor and theologian Dr. Don Thorsen explains: “Forgiveness is always an individual process. We cannot make anyone forgive another person. We can never replace a person’s subjective experience by simply saying, ‘Let it go.’ Instead, we can provide space, measure the risks and losses, help people express their grief and rage, and eventually, assist people to choose grace.”
Forgiveness is not only something prescribed by Christianity that should be practiced, but it is also something that should be viewed as a blessing. By forgiving another person, we open our heart to a new way of thinking and understanding. We start to see things in a different light, which not only brings us joy, but it could also help others to find their way to Christianity.
Human Nature and Capacity to Forgive
Humans have a natural capacity to forgive those who have wronged them. People can completely erase the hurt they feel and move forward in life while being connected with the one who wronged them. It might be easier said than done, but it is achievable if followed through with faith and determination.
Rev. Fr Cassian Noubissi says, “Forgiveness is something that does not come naturally to most of us but is a process that has to be taught. It starts with recognising that each and every one of us needs grace, and that it is only in offering grace to someone else, we can truly be forgiven.”
Forgiveness does require a willingness to put in the effort to understand and appreciate the pain of the wrongdoer. It requires an internal process of releasing oneself from the negative aspects of the experience and being able to extend grace towards the other person.
Theologian Rev. Richard Rohr writes in his book Religion and Wisdom: “Forgiveness is not something we do; it is something we experience. It is something you live and choose and ultimately something one is. We must be prepared to be vulnerable, to suffer, and to love unconditionally. It is not something we merely read about or understand, but something we must commit to practice.”
Embrace Forgiveness
Forgiveness, as a concept, can often be seen as a scary thing to do. It might be hard to face the wrong that has happened and to let go of the emotional pain associated with it. Forgiveness needs to be embraced fully, however, as it can bring about healing in a person both physically and emotionally. Christians are encouraged to bring their emotional, physical, and spiritual healing through a practice of deep and conscious forgiveness.
When a person is able to forgive, they free the wrongdoer of their guilty feelings and can give them the room to further transform themselves through making the right choices. The act of forgiving can also bring healing to oneself by repelling any inner negativity or: resentful emotions.
Pastor and author Joel Osteen believes “forgiveness is the choice we make to let people off the hook and, in doing so, we’re freeing ourselves from all the negativity that comes with not forgiving. The more we forgive and focus on the good, the more we’ll break free from negative thoughts and emotions.”
Releasing any and all negative thoughts and emotions not only sets one free from any lingering bitterness, but it also allows the person to live in their truth and confidence, without putting a wedge between them and other people.
But in order to truly forgive, one must be willing to take a step back and assess where they are at emotionally: Is there something that still needs to be released? Is there room for compassion towards the other person? Are the feelings of hurt still being carried around?
How to Forgive
It can be difficult to forgive or accept someone’s wrong, even if they have repented. To make things easier, one can start off by recognizing how the experience has affected them emotionally, physically, and spiritually.
This type of self-reflection helps to create a better understanding of the feelings associated with the experience. Through being aware of one’s feelings towards the other person, one can form a more concrete way to bridge the gap between both parties.
Further, it is important to remember that forgiving someone does not have to mean reconciliation. It is possible to forgive from a place of love, without any external involvement or continuing the relationship with the other person.
It is a freeing experience that involves both the wronged person and the wrongdoer. The wronged person makes the conscious decision to forgive and begin healing, and the wrongdoer must work hard to make sure the righting of the wrong is done and that forgiveness is accepted.
It is recommended to not only verbally communicate the wrong being done and to forgive, but also to take it a step further by demonstrating one’s forgiveness with their actions.
When both parties work together, the circle of forgiveness is completed and the healing can begin for both parties. It is a grace-filled process that is required for spiritual growth, peace of mind, and emotional well-being.
Practice of Self Forgiveness
Humans are flawed and make mistakes; it is a part of life. Self-forgiveness is an essential part of the forgiveness process. We must be able to forgive ourselves for our mistakes, as we are worthy of grace and forgiveness, too.
Theologian Lori Kelly explains: “Forgiveness of self is the act of reclaiming and reclaiming your identity and integrating that into who God has called you. It is a process of recognizing our sins and humbly taking action to repent and make amends.”
Making mistakes in life is part of the learning process and is necessary for character development. Forgiving oneself can bring forth a sense of peace, closure and a deeper understanding of one’s capacity to achieve. It is about recognizing the value of each experience for the insight it brings.
We all have a responsibility to ourselves and to others to show ourselves some grace. It is part of living out a faith-filled life and allows us to reflect on our mistakes and use them to grow.
Conclusion of Forgiveness
Forgiveness is a virtue highly advocated in Christianity. Through forgiveness, we learn to accept our wrongdoings and to extend grace to others. Through self-reflection and recognizing our faults, we free ourselves and others from anger, hate and rancor, taking a step closer to peace of mind.
Forgiveness is key in living a sincere and real Christian life. It is our way of showing compassion and understanding to others, while also showing ourselves, and our God, that we are living in his principles and to the highest moral standards.
